It's weird how one little day can change things. One little moment and your world has been turned upside down. One moment you feel like your drowning and the next someone has grabbed your hand and pulling you back into the boat. The safe haven in the middle of a raging storm. My safe haven is out there. I just have to look. Sometimes I feel like my light house is out of whack. I have to remember that it isn't though. I just need to look harder. It's there.
It's amazing how much my life has changed in the past month. How many friends I have made and to finally decide I know what I want in my life. Now I just have to remember how to organize it all. Where to put my priorities. I've had a whole summer to forget. But no worries, I will get it figured out, because I have had many discussions over the last with with Heavenly Father. And though I don't agree with everything, I know He is always right. I just have to remember that, hard as it may be at times.
Remembering. That is all it comes down to. Remembering that I am loved. Remembering how to organize my life. Remembering that even though there are hard times, everything will work out in the end, even if it wasn't the way I thought I wanted it to work out. Lots of times I forget but that's when those little nudges come that say "Remember" and it's all I need. Silly as it all might seem, it's true.
Sunday, September 30, 2012
Sunday, September 9, 2012
30 hours of work + 16 credits = Tired Molly!!!
Yup! That's correct! I worked 30 stinkin hours this week! And holy cow am I tired! They messed up my availability hours with someone else's and so I worked a lot more hours than I should have. Its nice for the money but its not nice for the studying or my sanity! Don't get me wrong though! I really really like my job though! I have made some good friends and we have lots of fun! We have a work party today and I'm really excited cause I just get to go and hang out with all the cool people that I work with. Plus, free food! What college student would turn that down?!? Only a crazy one! Plus, there's a lovely boy that I'm keeping an eye on and he informed me that he would be present at this little shin dig. So why the heck would I not go?!? I made Red velvet cupcakes for it cause we were supposed to bring dessert or a salad. I only make little salads cause I'm the only one who eats them, deserts I can share with people and so it was a dessert that came to pass :) AHHH! I love school and I love work! I'm super busy but I would tons rather have that over last year of laziness any day!
Wednesday, September 5, 2012
Round Two
Hmmm... Wow. Well that last post was forever ago! So long ago that here I am again at school after the summer off. That means I'm a sophomore! Look at me! Sadly, since I did play a lot last year and therefore I killed myself school wise. Oh dear. So now I'm a bit behind on the nursing front. It didn't help that I started having second thoughts last year and I just felt that it was too hard. I take it back though! I'm being a nurse gosh dang it! That is what I have always wanted to do and so that's what I'm going to do! I'm thinking about having a minor in sign language because it will set me apart from other nurses being considered for any of the jobs I apply for. I just really hope that when I graduate I will be able to work here in Utah! I just love it here and I really don't want to ever leave for a long time!
This summer was quite crazy. The first month I went back and forth from Logan to Idaho Falls because well, to put it in a nicer way, I was being a brat. I did NOT want to go home and I was being really stupid. I did end up back home and it was a bit rough for a while but my family was amazing and dealt with me until the end. Thank you family. I wasn't a nice person for a while. Thank you for loving me anyways! I went back to Jimmy John's got a raise and worked about 40 hours a week. It was rough but I made it!
I got a job at Maceys as a bagger for this year and so far I really like it. It's pretty tough working and doing school at the same time but I fell like it is tons better to do that for me instead of not having a job and being lazy like I did last year! I am making new friends there and I'm making money that I really need! So pretty much all the way around its nice! I really can't wait to see how this year pans out but I really do think that it is going to be a great year and though I shall be super busy, I think that I will be able to study hard, work hard, and play hard!
I really hope that I will be better about writing on this thing this year!
This summer was quite crazy. The first month I went back and forth from Logan to Idaho Falls because well, to put it in a nicer way, I was being a brat. I did NOT want to go home and I was being really stupid. I did end up back home and it was a bit rough for a while but my family was amazing and dealt with me until the end. Thank you family. I wasn't a nice person for a while. Thank you for loving me anyways! I went back to Jimmy John's got a raise and worked about 40 hours a week. It was rough but I made it!
I got a job at Maceys as a bagger for this year and so far I really like it. It's pretty tough working and doing school at the same time but I fell like it is tons better to do that for me instead of not having a job and being lazy like I did last year! I am making new friends there and I'm making money that I really need! So pretty much all the way around its nice! I really can't wait to see how this year pans out but I really do think that it is going to be a great year and though I shall be super busy, I think that I will be able to study hard, work hard, and play hard!
I really hope that I will be better about writing on this thing this year!
Monday, January 30, 2012
Amazing Weekend
Oh what a weekend this has been. Friday I called my mom in tears. I had gotten out of Anatomy and I hadn't understood one thing that my professor had lectured on. I could think straight and I started panicking. I told he I wanted a blessing and I wanted my daddy to give it to me. I told her I knew he couldn't give me one though and I really didn't want to ask my home teachers or anybody else. I told her I would probably call Tim though and ask him if he could give me one. She told me that I needed to go home and just study hard and that I would be fine. So I did. I went home and studied. Then a few hours later I get a call from my mom. Pretty much all she said was "Me and Daddy will be there tonight. I will see you later" I didn't think that I had heard her correctly and I had to have her tell it to me again then I said "Its ok Mommy, you don't have to." she replied, "That's what Mommies do." and that was that. I have the greatest parents in the whole universe! They are amazing! So they came and we went out to dinner and I showed them my new purple strip in my hair that Rachael and I had put in and we talked. I got my Father's Blessing :) I went to bed that night very grateful for my parents. i just hope that this visit will keep me tied over until the next time I get to go home.
Saturday I got up and studied. When Rachael woke up we went to the bridal fair that they were having in the TSC. I told Rachael that since she is practically going to get married soon (even though she denies it) that she got to be the "bride" she didn't like that very much. So, basically what happened, was when someone asked us who was the bride, whoever answered first, they said the other one was the bride. Rachael got to be the bride a lot :) Heehee! Then we saw the rings that they had and I found my wedding ring! I have never wanted on with a big diamond. I want it simple and pretty. It is. Its prefect. They let me try it on and it fit my finger perfectly. Now all I need to do is get a man to buy it for me. Not anytime soon, mind you. Just soon enough that they still have it somewhere in the storage so I can have it.
Saturday I got up and studied. When Rachael woke up we went to the bridal fair that they were having in the TSC. I told Rachael that since she is practically going to get married soon (even though she denies it) that she got to be the "bride" she didn't like that very much. So, basically what happened, was when someone asked us who was the bride, whoever answered first, they said the other one was the bride. Rachael got to be the bride a lot :) Heehee! Then we saw the rings that they had and I found my wedding ring! I have never wanted on with a big diamond. I want it simple and pretty. It is. Its prefect. They let me try it on and it fit my finger perfectly. Now all I need to do is get a man to buy it for me. Not anytime soon, mind you. Just soon enough that they still have it somewhere in the storage so I can have it.
One of my favorite parts about Saturday was that we had a slumber party in the living room. Me, Rachael, and Kaisa all dragged our mattresses out into the living room and watched Psych and hung out. It was super fun but I found that even though my bed isn't all the comfortable, its better then sleeping on my mattress on the floor!!!
Sunday was amazing too. I got to hang out with all my fabulous ward buddies and we got to hear Elder Holland speak!!! It was SO good! He spoke about Joseph Smith and all about his life. It was awesome! And on top of that we were only like 20 feet away! It was so cool! Before he gave his talk he told us that you weren't anybody if you weren't an Aggie. True story! So take that everyone who isn't an Aggie! Hmmm... I should tell that to my Daddy... He teases me lots about being an Aggie. That shall be the next thing that I do :) Well, that pretty much sums up my fabulous weekend :)
Monday, January 23, 2012
Goodbye Doesn't Mean Forever, But It Feels Like It!!
I had to say goodbye to many things this weekend. I had to say goodbye to my family and go back to Logan, I had to say goodbye to the way I thought things should always be, and I had to say goodbye to one of my very best friends.
Carson is leaving for the MTC on Wednesday and his farewell was on Sunday, so I went up. We had a great weekend. We hung out Friday and Saturday night just doing nothing but talking and laughing. He did such a good job on his talk! He got nervous and when he gets nervous he starts making jokes, though they aren't always funny :) We went to his house afterward and all I wanted to do was throw myself down on the floor, like I have been doing for years, and talk and have fun. But we couldn't cause everyone else was there. I don't think it actually hit me that he was leaving until about 2 o'clock when we were just sitting downstairs talking. I don't like driving back in the dark so I figured I would leave around 2:30ish and leave home about about 3:30ish. So at about 3 I go to say goodbye and I just start crying. I didn't think I would. But I did. All I kept thinking was I'm so proud of him but I hate that I have to be left behind. See, here's the logic that goes on in my head, it's ok for me to leave for college but it's not ok for anyone else to change and move. These are my friends, they kept me going through high school. We had our ups and downs but in the end we all made it.
So I go to leave and I just can't. So I stayed. And then I would look at the clock and 45 min would have gone by and so I would get really sad again and Carson kept looking at me and kept saying "What?" Even though he knew what. And I would reply "I don't wanna go!" So then I would stay. I stayed until 5 o'clock because he had to go talk to his stake president. Its a good thing too, cause I don't think that I would have ever left if he didn't have to leave. He looked at me and we both knew I had to go. So he asked me if I wanted him to walk me to my car. He has always done that when I leave. I don't remember a time when he hasn't walked me to my car... So he walked me to my car and I started crying again. I gave him one last hug and left. Then I cried in the car. When I got home mom took one look at my face and said "Oh baby." That's all it took and I was crying again.
I honestly didn't think that goodbye would be so hard. I will write to him and just be his friend. I'm so proud of him. Good luck Elder Cox. I will see you when you get home!
Carson is leaving for the MTC on Wednesday and his farewell was on Sunday, so I went up. We had a great weekend. We hung out Friday and Saturday night just doing nothing but talking and laughing. He did such a good job on his talk! He got nervous and when he gets nervous he starts making jokes, though they aren't always funny :) We went to his house afterward and all I wanted to do was throw myself down on the floor, like I have been doing for years, and talk and have fun. But we couldn't cause everyone else was there. I don't think it actually hit me that he was leaving until about 2 o'clock when we were just sitting downstairs talking. I don't like driving back in the dark so I figured I would leave around 2:30ish and leave home about about 3:30ish. So at about 3 I go to say goodbye and I just start crying. I didn't think I would. But I did. All I kept thinking was I'm so proud of him but I hate that I have to be left behind. See, here's the logic that goes on in my head, it's ok for me to leave for college but it's not ok for anyone else to change and move. These are my friends, they kept me going through high school. We had our ups and downs but in the end we all made it.
So I go to leave and I just can't. So I stayed. And then I would look at the clock and 45 min would have gone by and so I would get really sad again and Carson kept looking at me and kept saying "What?" Even though he knew what. And I would reply "I don't wanna go!" So then I would stay. I stayed until 5 o'clock because he had to go talk to his stake president. Its a good thing too, cause I don't think that I would have ever left if he didn't have to leave. He looked at me and we both knew I had to go. So he asked me if I wanted him to walk me to my car. He has always done that when I leave. I don't remember a time when he hasn't walked me to my car... So he walked me to my car and I started crying again. I gave him one last hug and left. Then I cried in the car. When I got home mom took one look at my face and said "Oh baby." That's all it took and I was crying again.
I honestly didn't think that goodbye would be so hard. I will write to him and just be his friend. I'm so proud of him. Good luck Elder Cox. I will see you when you get home!
Trevin, Tara, Molly, and Carson
December 27, 2011
Wednesday, January 18, 2012
New Beginnings
New year, new classes, new semester, new roommates, and new friends. I love this semester! It's only been a week and a 1/2 but I think that I will do fabulous! I LOVE LOVE LOVE my classes. My bestest lady Rachael and I have 2 whole classes together!! I love it! I have 2 awesome PE classes (NEVER thought I would say that about PE but it's true!!) Figure skating with Anna and Cassie, it is SO much fun!! I learned how to spin yesterday and I was doing really good. Then I started getting dizzy but I thought I could get in one more spin until I had to stop and wait until I stopped being dizzy. That didn't happen. 1/2 way through I got too dizzy and just fell right on the ice. It hurt SO much! It was one of those times where I could have cried or laughed. I laughed but on the inside I was screaming and crying. Then I had to crawl to the wall so that I could get up because it hurt so bad I didn't think I would be able to stand by myself. A little bit embarrassing but funny at the same time. Then I have kickboxing. My first class was last week and I thought that I would die cause I found my stomach muscles. I think that it will be super good for me though. I actually really like it. Its a good stress reliever and its fun. I met a few girls in there and we all aren't very good so it makes me feel loads better about myself. I love it though. I have Creative Arts and my professor is fabulous! He is an opera singer and he plays the piano insanely good!! Plus, he is funny and makes class interesting! I love my Human Anat professor. I think that I should do pretty well in that class. I know that it will be insanely hard but I think that I can do it. Unlike Physiology (which I strongly hate) I love Anat. Though I have found that I hate to labs. Oh well, I guess I can't have everything be good for me! I have to have a few things that I hate or it wouldn't be school :) I have Math and there was a blue blue eyed cowboy in there!!!! but then we got a seating chart and he didn't sit by me like he had the other times so we got separated. But I'm tricky!!! I told my professor that I would like a closer seat (there was an empty one by this blue eyed cowboy) and he told me to put my name in the spot where there was another empty spot on the same row. I put my name by the cowboy when he wasn't looking!! I'm so naughty :) But its almost been a whole week and the cowboy hasn't been to class lately :( I'm going to be VERY sad if I find out he dropped the class!!! My last class that I do not like in the slightest is Humanities. The only thing that makes is bearable is that Rachael is in there with me. The professor is super boring and she makes us read these super weird articles. I don't like it but I'm sure it will be an easy 3 credits and I have to have it for one of my generals so I will just have to suck it up and hate it.
I get to go home this weekend!!!! I LOVE going home!! It makes college even better. I always miss my family and I love going to see them! Going away makes you see how much you miss out on when you are gone so everything is so much more important when it comes to family. The main reason I'm going home is cause it is Carson's farewell but getting to see my family is a super extra bonus.
I'm really excited for Carson. He is going to El Salvador. He is one of my very best friends. Along with Tara and Trevin. Those three got me through high school in one piece. Yes, we had our ups and downs but what friends don't? I will forever be grateful for them cause I just love them so very much. It really is amazing to think that Tara and I met when we were in 5th grade and have been friends ever since. Then Carson and Trevin came along and that made up our little group. I love hanging out with them. They can always make me laugh. I will be very sad when that can't happen any longer. We are all starting to go our separate live. Tara and I are in college, Carson is leaving next Wednesday, and Trevin is going to leave for his mission soon too (though he has to get his mission call first). If I could go back in time and tell little me a few things I would tell her, "Don't you worry. Though you think that you will die sometimes, and sometimes you think that the world hates you, you get your feelings hurt and just want to be swallowed up into the earth, you will be ok. I promise. Just don't forget that your momma and daddy love you. They will do anything and everything they can for you. You will meet people that you can't even imagine how you lived without them. You will go to college and you won't be able to remember why your brother and sisters drove you so crazy cause you love them so much. Remember to go to church and say your prayers and read your scriptures, and if you do this then Heavenly Father will make sure you will be fine."
I love my life. Though sometimes I think that I could have done somethings better, I'm not sure if someone told me I could change it I would. Everything that I have done has made me, me. I like who I am.
I get to go home this weekend!!!! I LOVE going home!! It makes college even better. I always miss my family and I love going to see them! Going away makes you see how much you miss out on when you are gone so everything is so much more important when it comes to family. The main reason I'm going home is cause it is Carson's farewell but getting to see my family is a super extra bonus.
I'm really excited for Carson. He is going to El Salvador. He is one of my very best friends. Along with Tara and Trevin. Those three got me through high school in one piece. Yes, we had our ups and downs but what friends don't? I will forever be grateful for them cause I just love them so very much. It really is amazing to think that Tara and I met when we were in 5th grade and have been friends ever since. Then Carson and Trevin came along and that made up our little group. I love hanging out with them. They can always make me laugh. I will be very sad when that can't happen any longer. We are all starting to go our separate live. Tara and I are in college, Carson is leaving next Wednesday, and Trevin is going to leave for his mission soon too (though he has to get his mission call first). If I could go back in time and tell little me a few things I would tell her, "Don't you worry. Though you think that you will die sometimes, and sometimes you think that the world hates you, you get your feelings hurt and just want to be swallowed up into the earth, you will be ok. I promise. Just don't forget that your momma and daddy love you. They will do anything and everything they can for you. You will meet people that you can't even imagine how you lived without them. You will go to college and you won't be able to remember why your brother and sisters drove you so crazy cause you love them so much. Remember to go to church and say your prayers and read your scriptures, and if you do this then Heavenly Father will make sure you will be fine."
I love my life. Though sometimes I think that I could have done somethings better, I'm not sure if someone told me I could change it I would. Everything that I have done has made me, me. I like who I am.
Monday, January 9, 2012
First Day of Second Semester
Well, here I am. Back at USU and I made it through my first day of the new semester! What a crazy day it has been! I have 5 classes before 1 o'clock but then I'm all done. I think that I will take it! I had to get into a math class and hadn't been able to get the one that I wanted so I e-mailed the professor and he said all I have to do is show up to class on Tuesday and he will get me in! Yay! Which means I now have a 7:30 class again and I think that it will be good. I super excited about my kickboxing class that I'm taking and then figure skating class too! It's gonna be great! Whoot whoot!
I moved into a new room and I think that I'm gonna like it here. I LOVE being with Rachael! And I really like that there is only one door so everyone has to socialize. They are all super nice. Now all I have to worry about is going to sleep. I didn't sleep at all last night! I seriously felt like I was watching to hours tick by. Then finally at like 5:30 I went to sleep but then I had to wake up at 6:45 to get ready. Ugg. Not fair! I'm not really all that tired though. I'm sure that it will hit me tomorrow though. Oh joy.
While I was at home I didn't get any texts. I'm pretty sure that 1/2 of them came from my family and the other 1/2 came from all my friends here but of course they are all with their families and so they don't want to talk. I just thought that it was really funny. I never got texts in high school from anyone. I suppose that it makes me feel good that I'm text loved by my friends at college :)
I had to finish paying for my books today for this semester. It was killer! I think that I had to spend almost $500 on books! Insane! And my back account now hates me. Oh well. I suppose that working this summer will be good and then I might have lots(ish) of money! I think that my scholarships will cover all of next year too so I won't have to worry about anything but books and groceries. I really hope that Rachael doesn't get engaged or married by then and that we might be able to have a few more semesters together. Ahhh well. I suppose I will just have to wait and see what happens!
I moved into a new room and I think that I'm gonna like it here. I LOVE being with Rachael! And I really like that there is only one door so everyone has to socialize. They are all super nice. Now all I have to worry about is going to sleep. I didn't sleep at all last night! I seriously felt like I was watching to hours tick by. Then finally at like 5:30 I went to sleep but then I had to wake up at 6:45 to get ready. Ugg. Not fair! I'm not really all that tired though. I'm sure that it will hit me tomorrow though. Oh joy.
While I was at home I didn't get any texts. I'm pretty sure that 1/2 of them came from my family and the other 1/2 came from all my friends here but of course they are all with their families and so they don't want to talk. I just thought that it was really funny. I never got texts in high school from anyone. I suppose that it makes me feel good that I'm text loved by my friends at college :)
I had to finish paying for my books today for this semester. It was killer! I think that I had to spend almost $500 on books! Insane! And my back account now hates me. Oh well. I suppose that working this summer will be good and then I might have lots(ish) of money! I think that my scholarships will cover all of next year too so I won't have to worry about anything but books and groceries. I really hope that Rachael doesn't get engaged or married by then and that we might be able to have a few more semesters together. Ahhh well. I suppose I will just have to wait and see what happens!
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